21 Things I've Done, Stopped Doing, Won't Do and Want To Do To My Face
Today's Guest Post by Sam Verdile
Happy Wednesday & welcome to the first of our Guest Posts! If you’re just tuning in, over the next 5 weeks while I’m preparing to, recovering from and actually getting married, your inboxes will be blessed with a guest post written by Hotline Skin community members and skincare experts. As a reminder, I’ll still be holding weekly Office Hours for paid subscribers through the end of the month.
I am beyond delighted to introduce you to today’s guest post writer, Sam Verdile. She isn’t a skincare professional, but she has had an article she wrote about her skin go viral and as you will soon see, has a lot of informed things to say about treating your skin. You see, Sam’s expertise is in executive comms. She knows how to talk, ask questions, listen intently, ask more questions, do research and communicate her findings. She also happens to be one of my best friends, but that’s not why I accepted her pitch. I did so because she is an honest, transparent, expert communicator who has tried a lot of stuff for her skin and loves talking about it. She’s also absolutely hilarious and it’s only fair you guys get a peek inside our texts.
Speaking of our texts, did you know that’s how our friendship blossomed? Sam and I were introduced on Instagram during the pandemic and she’s who convinced me that going to esthetician school was the right move. This was before we’d ever met IRL, spoke on the phone or even exchanged voice memos. Now we hardly go a day without communicating and she’s coming to my wedding. Meeting people on the Internet sometimes works out!!!
Last thing you need to know about Sam––her skin is one of my favorite mysteries. It’s dry, acne-prone and reacts to things that make no sense, including air. She is the perfect example of everyone’s skin responds differently and just because someone seems to have similar skin/concerns, it doesn’t mean products will have the same results for you. It’s taken a while to craft her perfect routine (which is extremely minimal, gentle & looks nothing like yours or mine) and helping her do so is honestly so much fun for me. I’ll let her take it from here. Everyone, meet Sam.
I’m 36 (with no kids, aka I have spare time and income), I think I look pretty good, and skincare is my hobby. I’ve spent a good amount of money over the years either
1) clearing my acne, as I’ve written about;
2) trying to erase the aftermath of said acne (including scarring and CHRONICALLY dry skin); or
3) chasing the unattainable beauty standards that the tabloid culture of the early 2000s imprinted on my subconscious.
I go to therapy and am well-adjusted [ish] [now], but I am also honest to a fault. Here’s some things I’ve done to address the above, and if they were worth it—ranging from how I wash my face all the way to different types of filler. Read to the end for a bonus round of things I’d never do, and what’s on my wishlist.
THINGS I’VE DONE
TREATMENT: Clear & Brilliant Laser
It’s a laser treatment aimed at skin texture and collagen stimulation. Not a lunchtime laser, but pretty mild as far as lasers go.Pros: It really, REALLY helped my natural redness. I have so much ruddiness in my complexion. My derm used a special attachment for this.
Cons: I didn’t see improvement in my pore size, skin texture, fine lines, or anything else promised. Expensive!! And you need to budget time for recovery; I had three days of intense peeling. Needs to be done as a series of three (at least). Please know that people aren’t scamming you when they push a laser as a series. The results are cumulative. In fact, if you’re specifically focused on acne scars, you NEED to do a series, because sometimes the scars get worse before they get better (because of the way the collagen is rebuilding underneath).
TREATMENT: Microneedling
Tiny needles create micro-injuries in the skin, tricking it into producing new collagen. Similar idea to lasers, but with tiny needles instead of tiny laser light beams. Not the same as those at-home rollers, which you should throw out immediately unless you want to get an infection.
Pros: Way cheaper than a set of lasers and, for me, similar results. Incredible skin clarity and even tone.
Cons: Didn’t get the fine line reduction I hoped for. Also the recovery is annoying —and the same goes for any laser worth its salt. It’s a full week for me: Three days of outrageous redness, three days of outrageous peeling. Please know the longer the recovery, the better the results, and that’s why I don’t believe anyone trying to sell me a “lunchtime laser”. Go deep or go home.
TREATMENT: Fraxel laser
This is an intermediate laser. Some derms feel one Fraxel=three Clear & Brilliants.
Pros: It can help build collagen over the long-term. This is the kind of thing where it’s like, “I know this is helping my skin over the long-term, but I’m not going to wake up and look like a different person.” It’s also supposed to help resurface your skin and address pore size and fine lines. Not me!
Cons: I saw better results from a set of three Clear & Brilliants than from one Fraxel (and Fraxel was more expensive). Pay for the C&B instead.
TREATMENT: Botox (forehead, crow’s feet)
If you’re reading this, you probably know what Botox is.
Pros: I’m a pretty princess. Also, nothing - N O T H I N G ! - is going to do what Botox does. No product is “a Botox substitute.” You can’t facial-massage your wrinkles away. Even a diligent laser regimen is not going to accomplish the same thing. I love getting Botox 2x a year because I don’t freeze my face. It’s more about keeping the existing wrinkles from ever getting any deeper. I have lines! Manageable ones.
I get it in my forehead and crow’s feet, but Botox has so many uses in the hands of a skilled injector. Migraine management, TMJ alleviation, jawline adjustments, etc etc. And as filler has fallen out of favor (for good reason), Botox remains unproblematic.
Cons: This isn’t a con as much as it is a word of caution: Too much forehead Botox over the long (loooong) term WILL make your forehead droop. Take breaks, don’t overdo it, try to stick to 2x a year at most. Oh, and, obviously, the best injectors are expensive. But cheap injectors…please just be safe. I don’t want you getting an infection or an injury. I worry about you!!!
TREATMENT: Under eye filler
As a reminder, Botox freezes your muscles. It’s not adding anything to your face, to be super simplistic about it. Filler IS adding a substance to your face.
Pros: I’ve gotten it twice in ten years. When done right, it LASTS. Mine made an instant difference. (My before-and-after is actually on Jolie’s IG.) This is the happiest a treatment has ever made me (this, and eyelash extensions.) Like oh, cool, an insecurity that’s nagged me for years just…vanished.
Cons: Filler has serious migration risk. That’s just a fact. Mine hasn’t migrated, but a sample size of one is not science. I think this specific area carries risk of being done poorly–there are a lot of people who don’t do this well. It requires serious anatomy knowledge. (For example, it does NOT go under the eye or in your tear trough. It’s injected safely in specific areas around the eye.)
TREATMENT: Lip filler
Pros: I’ll never, ever do it again?
Cons: I was going through a rough patch in 2020 and went to a very reputable plastic surgeon thinking I could make myself feel better (wrong!! WRONG!!!!!) by fixing (“fixing”, and please know I’m leaning heavily into those quotation marks) my appearance. I got the smallest amount possible, and it was fine—but it was not a decision I would have made in a normal state of mind. My darlings, my babies, my sweet angels: do not do something new to your face when you are in a deep valley of insecurity. If what I’m saying has you nodding, please: Go to therapy instead. (I’m talking about any treatment you feel impulsive about, NOT lip filler specifically. Lip filler rules, and it does for many people what eyelash extensions do for me.) DM me if you want to discuss this further. Talking about playing the unwinnable game of being a woman is my passion.
Lip filler also carries a huge migration risk. The conversation around filler is changing rapidly, which is encouraging. It is not as straightforward as it’s been made out to be. And dissolving it can have major complications! Run away from any provider who is nonchalant about any of this. More below.
TREATMENT: Laser Hair Removal
Pros: oh thank god, I was worried I'd get through this whole thing without talking about my vagina. I got laser hair removal 10 years ago. Ten years later, the hair is still…60% gone? Basically, I am now in a very nice place where I can easily remove it before I’m in a bathing suit. But if I want to be an adult and have pubic hair, I can do that, too, without it being unwieldy. This is just a comfort thing, not a male gaze thing. Grow a bush it might change your life
Cons: I’m pretty sure I was grouponing at that phase of my life but it was still expensive.
SERVICE: Eyelash Extensions
Pros: I am a body dysmorphia professional with a lifetime of issues. Lash extensions make me feel GOOD. I get them as natural and subtle-looking as possible. The self-esteem boost these give me is priceless. And never having to deal with the 72-hour ordeal that is removing mascara? Also priceless. Plus brushing them is the most satisfying ASMR ever. Everyone should experience this pleasure at least once.
Cons: Remember when I said priceless like four times? Good god, this is an expensive habit. Plus I spend the extra money to go to the best (bad extensions can ruin your lashes, good ones can actually make them healthier). You need to get them filled every 3-4 weeks so they don’t pull out your natural lashes as they grow out.
I only get extensions for a couple of months a year when I have a lot of travel happening. Also, I don’t feel great about the nonzero chance that they might worsen my ptosis (genetically saggy eyelids) long-term. You also have to train yourself to sleep on your back unless you want to wake up with lashes that look like busted venetian blinds.
METHOD: Oil cleansing with safflower oil before regular cleanser
Pros: Cheap!!!!!! Feels amazing. Gives a mini gua sha moment. Actually removes your sunscreen. Absolutely, positively cannot break you out because safflower is 100% acne-safe. I’ve been doing this for six years.
Cons: ??? It’s another step, I guess? But I reallllly do not want my sunscreen hanging out in my pores. Do this! Safflower oil only!
METHOD: Clean Skin Club Towels
Pros: When you are doing everything to fight off acne, it is important to wash your face with a clean towel every single night. Clean Skin Club does make it easy…
Cons: …but after 6 months, I could not stomach another $25/month charge, and they are so wasteful. I bought a 14-pack of the softest muslin cloths I could find. After several washes, they are like tissues. (also, fwiw, Clean Skin Club’s customer service sucks)
[Jolie note: I love these and recommend them all the time. They sound wasteful, but when you’ve struggled with acne for years, you get over it pretty quickly. I have them on a subscription and I also get the travel packs, which are a godsend for trips. JOLDEF saves you 20%]
PRODUCT: Stridex Pads
Pros: I use them for body acne to great success. You can also wipe your armpits with them and you will need less deodorant (this is the same reason many natural deodorants have acids)
Cons: good luck finding these shits in 2024. I order them online.
PRODUCT: Bioeffect 30-Day Serum
It’s a highly-concentrated growth-factor serum that you use for one month to rejuvenate your skin.
Pros: It’s only 30 days. I can use it with Celluma. My perpetually dry skin was actually moisturized, which is such a big deal. Nothing helps my dryness.
Cons: The price will make you want to kill yourself.
[Jolie note: Sam tried this with my encouragement and I consider it a personal accomplishment that it works as I hoped. This is the same brand as the eye serum I always tell you to get. The 30-Day is a concentrated “skin reset” then you maintain with the Power Serum. In addition to promoting hydration and moisture content, it helps with fine lines/wrinkles, hyperpigmentation and elasticity. The entire brand is currently 25% off at Dermstore, which is the best deal you’ll see.]
PRODUCT: Clearstem Hydraglow Moisturizer (specifically bakuchiol, the ingredient)
Pros: My holy grail product (specifically, I use Clearstem Hydraglow). It’s really, really hard to find an effective acne treatment that doesn’t dry out my skin. This is one of one. The bakuchiol keeps my pores clear, yet the product itself is super hydrating. I could replace my entire routine except for this. I use it every night.
Cons: Bakuchiol is not “natural retinol” just like cauliflower steak is not steak, it’s a grilled cauliflower cut into thirds. Bakuchiol is an amazing ingredient and powerful antioxidant, and we don’t have to get all weird about it and try to scare people away from retinoids. Just let bakuchiol be bakuchiol! Love is love! It doesn’t matter if you love him or capital H i m!
[Jolie note: Sam turned me onto this stuff. I cannot stand the smell (artificial blueberry candy?) and I just started my 4th jar, if that tells you anything.]
DEVICE: Celluma LED panel
LED masks, so hot right now. Celluma’s is a big panel instead of a mask.
Pros: The science is solid. Celluma’s product is more powerful and effective than Omnilux or Dr Dennis Gross. When I use it, my skin looks juicy, which is not a word you would ever use to describe my complexion. It has long term benefits, even if I’m not seeing them instantaneously, and I like stuff like that. And because it’s a panel, you can use it on the rest of your body, on injuries, etc. (Google it - legit)
Cons: It’s NOT cheap but it’s also the price of 2-3 facials and you’ll own it forever. I expensed mine with my one-time wellness stipend from work. Sorry, I am a cog in the capitalist machine, probably my second-biggest flaw as a person after vanity. But that’s a different essay.
[Jolie note: Another personal win for me. If you can’t stomach this price, this is my top LED mask rec. If you need helping picking or ordering a Celluma panel, feel free to email hi@joldef.com]
THINGS I DON’T DO ANYMORE!
That is, things I REMOVED from my routine and their ABSENCE has made my skin grow fonder:
METHOD: Never letting hot water touch my face
Pros: If you have eczema or naturally dry skin you might see a difference immediately. I did! Turns out the hot water was what was sucking moisture out of my face and making it super irritable.
Cons: Rainfall showerheads are the enemy. Be careful in the shower. Do not let that scalding hot water touch your face. I am so deeply serious about this one.
METHOD: Not washing my face in the morning
Pros: Better skin, more moisture, one less goddamn thing to do
Cons: ??? Clean your eyes, though! Very important!
ERRAND: Getting a blepharoplasty consultation
Pros: I was curious and it scratched my itch! My mom had a medically necessary bleph due to ptosis. I wanted to know if it was something I should consider. The answer was no, not yet. I went to Dr Hessler in Palo Alto and it was a most excellent experience. She did suggest PRP for my undereyes. That’s expensive so I haven’t done it. We love learning. Her resident also kindly chatted with me about radio frequency (see below).
Cons: maybe it was time wasted but not to me. It was nice to hear someone say, “no, that really wouldn’t do anything for you.” Maybe you are sensing a theme here.
PRODUCT: Tretinoin
Prescription retinoid, considered the gold standard for anti-aging & can help with acne.
Pros: It is a desert-island product for so many people.
Cons: But not for me! My skin just can’t hang. I know what I’m doing and I know how to introduce tret and, yeah, no. Nothing on this earth works for everyone, and that includes tret. My skin is so sensitive, dude. I am one night with the A/C on away from full-face flaking at all times.
THINGS I’LL NEVER DO
TREATMENT: More filler
Pros: Filler is fine when administered by someone who’s extremely well-trained and honest with you about what’s possible, what’s a bad idea, and potential complications. A good practitioner should be clear about the risk of migration, but also inject in a way that minimizes the likelihood of it happening.
Cons: Research continues to surface that shows long-term complications from filler, especially if you want or need some sort of facial surgery down the line. And hyaluronidase (how filler is dissolved) is not without its cons.
TREATMENT: Morpheus, Ultherapy, Sofwave, Profound, etc
Pros: These are often billed as a “non-invasive facelift.” Some people have amazing results.
Cons: Some people have nightmare results. Many plastic surgeons have gone on record saying these procedures can melt fat, prematurely age people, and fuse tissues together in a way that also creates facelift complications down the road. That’s not a universally-held belief, but it’s popular enough that it scares me off. Plus, these are expensive! Save that money and put it in your facelift piggy bank for 20 years from now. Or stop looking in the mirror and go on vacation.
THINGS I WANT TO DO
BBL with Moxi:
Moxi is a laser that helps with texture & tone, BBL stands for broadband light, another type of laser that helps with pigment. They’re commonly used together.
I’ve read so many good things about this as a maintenance procedure for keeping your skin texture healthy. I’m waiting until winter because lasers make your skin extremely vulnerable, and I’m stressed enough about SPF in the summer.
Office Hours Reminder
Join us for Office Hours on Sunday! This exclusive weekly opportunity is available to paying subscribers.
Every Sunday at 5pm EST, I’ll begin a new thread for the week in Substack Chat, where you can ask me anything. Every Monday from 5-6pm EST, I’ll be in that chat live, answering questions for the hour. That way, if you can’t make it, you can submit any time after 5pm Sunday and still get an answer. If you can make it live, join in! You can ask questions in real time and (hopefully) interact with others in class ;)
Thank you, Sam! She’s very eager to chat, so get yappin’ in the comments!
xx,
Jolie
I feel so naked! How exhilarating
Wash your eyes?? Pls explain